oxymoron:

noun, plural oxymora 

[ok-si-mawr–uh, –mohr–uh] (Show IPA), oxymorons. Rhetoric

1. a figure of speech by which a locution produces an incongruous, seemingly self-contradictory effect, as in “cruel kindness” or “to make haste slowly.”

Reality television. That’s an oxymoron, isn’t it?

I’ve taken many an issue with reality TV since the beginning. Not so much because it’s bad TV, but because it’s the worst kind of addiction. It’s visual heroin. Once you start, you can’t stop and there is nothing to be gained through putting your own life on hold just to watch a virtual stranger live theirs.

Really, all it is as a cut and paste, with added music and few wacky situations.

In my 2014 end of year rant, I believe I wrote:

And lastly, I am offended by reality television, because it tries to draw us in, make us care about and invest in the lives of people we do not know–to the point where we forget that we are not living our own lives anymore.

On general principle, I have tried to reject all reality TV. The boom of non-scripted shows drove MTV to stop playing music videos. Since most channels run “reality” shows to maximize profit, since doing so puts so many writers out of business.

That was before the New Kids On The Block got into reality television.

Don’t judge me.

Say what you will (and I know you will) but that band of 5 was my first real crush. Specifically Donnie Wahlberg. I have loved them for over half of my life.

So . . .

Here’s where I become a hypocrite

The New Kids On The Block had to go and start-in with their reality shows! Now, I am actively anticipating, engaged in, and invested with THREE reality shows.

1. Wahlburgers

 

 

1. Donnie Loves Jenny

 

 

1. Rock This Boat

 

 

. . . God, help me.

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“Why the ladies’ lavatory?”
The question was simple enough to answer, but the context of delivery made me want to burst with laughter. It was tough, but I suppressed it. We were expecting visitors any second. “The men’s room will be the first place they check.”
“Why not make a mad dash to the parking lot?”
“If they’re not already out there, they will be.”
“What makes you the expert?”
“I used to stalk the New Kids on the Block.” I smiled sheepishly, totally dating myself.
“Did they ever hide in the men’s room?”
“I would have found them if they did.”

***From Between Octobers: A scene wherein Grace is trying to help Evan (aka Rhys) escape a hoard of fans by hiding in the women bathroom.